Forward and Buck trust that refusal is the trigger of obsessive love. They state four conditions to help recognize it, namely, a painful and all-consuming preoccupation with a real or wished-for lover, a greedy longing either to have or be possessed by the intention of their obsession, rejection by or physical and/or emotional unavailability of their target, and being driven to behave in self-defeating ways by this rejection or unavailability.
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